Life feeling Too Hard?
Today on my run I was reminded of a strategy I came up with years ago that was centered around running+motivation…big shocker, I know! Buuut I am thinking it could be applied to multiple situations and could be super helpful to you…I am hoping.
Here is my rule…I figured out that I am able to do hard things by accessing personal motivation through commitment, resolve, or even habit with two difficult circumstances against me but throw in a third and I am just asking too much of myself.
Think three strikes, I’m out!
I started running in 2003 when we lived in Northern California and TBH the only inclement weather I ever ran in there was rain and that was super fun to me:) Sometimes it got hot but then we would drive coastal and be fine. After seven years we moved to San Diego…hello perfect weather and, of course, the weather NEVER kept me from running there.
In 2014 we moved back to our home state of Utah. Hello! Winter running. I also in 2017 got a job M-F/8-5. Suddenly I found myself challenged to keep my running {hobby+addiction} streak going. I quickly learned my capacity which I adopted as a personal rule: I could deal with TWO running challenges but not THREE. In other words, I could run if it was dark and cold if I had a friend to run with. I could also run alone in the cold, if it was not dark. You get the idea. So, if there was a day that I could not take the difficulty factor down to two then I understood I would do something other than run for exercise. {Or run at the gym..always an option, not a fav though}
I was thinking that this type of self awareness has been helpful for me when setting boundaries. For example, I remember when my third son was in kindergarten and I had a fourth who was a preschooler and I was asked to help out in the kindergarten classroom.
Doing so meant that
1. I found a babysitter for my 4th son.
2. I was donating my personal time.
This was all good until it tipped over to a third strike for me. One day I walked into the classroom and the teacher had set up the class in sections and my son was not assigned to my section. My son was a very young kindergartener and this was tough on him…and his mama. So, I told the teacher that I was happy to help out in the classroom but would want to be able to interact with my son. It was fine. In the future, she arranged things so I would be able to work with my son. Not being able to work with my son, in this situation, was my third strike.
This is a tool that is helpful as a way to acknowledge what you {or others} might be asking of you with self compassion.
There are other ways to offset challenging or difficult times. I remember being asked to do a task at a job that felt very tedious and honestly a waste of my time and capabilities. I realized that showing up to do this task was making me crazy and setting off my three strikes alarm. What did I do? I found positive things to offset the challenge…I found out that I could wear something different than the required uniform when I was performing said task, I also found that I could listen to music or a podcast or book while working. Sometimes if I was working alongside a colleague we would make a game out of the task with counting or competing in some way.
If there is a way to change or eliminate the strikes then by all means do that…as in don’t want to be alone: take a friend. Dark and cold: go to the gym. Tedious work: add music, podcast, competition with others.
Allow yourself to accept personal limitations without judgement but with necessary accommodations.
Life is not {2} too hard…but three…oh yeah! That’s too hard. At least for me.
Do you know your number?
What do you do if you strike out?
What accommodations might help you to persevere?
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